For starters, children, even older children, need time to adjust to new ideas and changes. To start, prepare your children by talking about the move as early as possible. When you talk about the move, talk about the reasons why honestly. It will seem like a huge ordeal at first, but, the more that you talk about it, the more common place the topic will be, and the easier to accept it becomes.When you broach the subject, and discuss it afterwards, there's definitely going to be crying and temper tantrums from younger children, and/or rage from the older children. It's important to respect these feelings and to let the children go through them all. Be supportive and patient with their emotions.
Before moving, give the children a tour of the house and the neighborhood. Point out all the things that are similar between the old and the new. Find places for them to do their favorite activities, and places for them to make new friends! Sign them up for extracurricular activities so they can both have the comfortable routine they've been used to and be around others of the same age and similar interests. Be excited with them when they come home talking about these new connections in their life and encourage them to deepen them!
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On the actual moving day, be prepared for the whole gamete of emotions. To help reduce the impact, let the children enjoy their last moments in the house as long as possible. Pack up their room and other entertainment at the last possible timing. When you arrive at the new house, make sure you unpack some of this entertainment for them as soon as possible. They may be interested in the unpacking and decorating. This is very helpful for them, as it will help them to feel that this new place is their place. If you unpack their room first, it will also convey a sense of their importance to you. Listen to the things they don't like, and discuss plans on how you can redecorate or remodel their space to make them more comfortable and happy!
To help them make friends, start off by inviting the neighbors over to play at your place. Everyone will be curious about the new kids on the block, and it's a good way to give your children opportunities to make new friends as well. Also, don't neglect places like the public library or community center's free or low cost activities for both entertainment and friendship building.
Lastly, don't forget the phone calls and emails! Letting the children stay in touch with their friends from the old neighborhood will help ease their transition as well, and most probably will help to fade out those weaker bonds gradually, instead of losing everything at once!